Is all of this worth it?

So, do you ever feel like the walls of your home are closing in? Feel like you’re doing the same thing day in and day out like a CD on repeat? You do? Oh, thank goodness it’s not just me. Sometimes life has a way of doing that to you. To do lists and responsibilities seem daunting and continue to grow at an alarming rate until you’re so overwhelmed that the light at the end of the tunnel disappears. All you can see is the darkness. I still have to pay this bill but we need groceries and don’t forget the car needs to be fixed! Kids bickering, toys flying, spouse zoned out watching t.v. like the whole house hasn’t just turned into a chaotic mess. Put your hands down now, honey. Believe me, you’ll thank me when you look in the mirror and your hair is still there. Don’t pull it out just yet.

But seriously, sometimes I find myself wondering…is this how it is for everyone or just us? Tempers flare, yelling ensues, and everyone ends up being upset. Sometimes, I go to the bathroom when I don’t even have to go, just for a moment of peace. Only for about ten seconds before I hear little feet pounding through the house like a small elephant and then knocking.

“Mom, what are you doing?”

“I’m using the bathroom. What is it?”

“My crayon broke.”

“Well, sweetie, go get another crayon.”

“But I want this one.”

Then the older child knocks on the door. Why did I come to the bathroom again?

“Mom, where’s my hairbrush?”

“How should I know?”

“Well, it’s not in my bathroom and I know I left it there.”

“Oh, yeah, could you pass a polygraph on that?”

“What’s a polygraph?”

*smacks self in forehead*

Sometimes, you just want to go on a vacation for one. Yes, please! But we have to look at the good things and find that little microscopic ray of light that’s shining through. That sweet child who needed that one crayon to draw you a picture that’s so beautiful even though you have no idea what it is. That child who is growing up so fast into a strong, independent, God-loving person yet can still make you grind your teeth together with one roll of the eyes. A spouse that listens to you rant and rave and still loves you even when you’re acting like you’re one trip away from the psych ward.

Look for those small, everyday things; the kisses and hugs when you leave for work, the smiles and eye twinkles when you come home, those rare moments of unrestricted laughter that seems to echo off the walls. That moment after dinner when you look out the window and watch your kids take turns throwing the ball with their dad. The delight and joy on your child’s face when they hit a ball after several, frustrating tries.

Those are the moments that make it all worth it-the stained carpets, little sharp toys that leave your feet feeling disfigured, the marker lines on the kitchen table; all of it. That’s when I feel my heart swell and I know there’s a purpose to all this madness. So, yes, it’s all worth every moment.

Comment below with your struggles or funny stories. What makes you feel like it’s all worth it?

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